There simply aren’t many hair options for bald men, but Atlanta Falcons defensive end John Abraham added a new one, and included a tribute to his mother. Could this create a new fad amongst bald people? Turn what’s left into a billboard and use your remaining mane to send messages. This could be a lucrative source of advertising revenue for bald athletes.
The voice of the Seattle Mariners, Hall of Fame broadcaster Dave Niehaus died today at the age of 75 (article). The legendary man was the Mariners’ broadcaster since their first season. He is best known for his catch phrases “Fly, fly away,” and “My oh My!”
For many Mariners fan, no matter how bad the game was (and there were a lot), Niehaus always made the game enjoyable for his great calls, great stories, and fascinating insights. Players and managers came and went, but through good seasons and bad, Niehaus was the one constant bright spot for Mariners’ fan. Players and fans loved him. He was an amazing sportscaster, an incredible man, and he will be greatly missed.
Get out the rye bread and mustard, Grandma, it is grand salami time!
During some on-court trash talking, Celtics center Kevin Garnett allegedly called the bald Charlie Villanueva a “cancer patient” (article). Villanueva, who has alopecia universalis, a medical condition that results in hair loss, sent out a tweet last night reading, “KG called me a cancer patient, I’m pissed because, u know how many people died from cancer, and he’s tossing it like it’s a joke.”
Garnett is well known for his trash talking, but Villanueva thought this comment crossed the line, and made it public. Garnett denied the comment, and claimed he said, “You are cancerous to your team and our league.“
Despite her hair loss, Kayla Martell won the 2010 Miss Deleware beauty pageant in June (article). The 21-year-old pageant winner suffers from alopecia areata, a condition that causes hair loss and afflicts 4.7 million Americans, according to the National Alopecia Areata Foundation.
The bald beauty queen wore a wig during the pageant, but has said, “I think I can be a better Miss Delaware and a better Miss America by taking the wig off.” By winning the Miss Deleware pageant, Martell will be competing in the upcoming Miss America pageant. And she has a few words for all the bald girls out there: “I know in my heart that every girl is a beauty queen, whether she has hair or not!”
You can check out her blog here.
Willow Smith, daughter of Will and Jada Pinckett-Smith, has released a new song titled “Whip My Hair.” Her new video gone viral and earned her legions of fans. But that fame has come at the expense of bald people everywhere who, through no fault of their own, simply can’t whip their hair. Thanks for rubbing it in Willow.
For the folically challenged, this new song is a grave reminder of the hair they lack. And while the hair Willow is flipping is most certainly not all her own, it’s still catching on at clubs around the country. When it comes on, the bald must retreat the corners of the club and endure the laughter and ridicule of other club-goers. Not since pancake-assed women were faced with Sir-Mix-Alot’s “Baby’s Got Back” has such a large segment of the population been relegated to the dancing sidelines.
When I’m down and i feel like giving up
I whip my hair back and forth
I whip my hair back and forth (just whip it)
So should those with out hair simply give up, Willow? Why do you have to shave the sides and leave it long on top, making it the most impossible hair style to emulate? What’s next? Is Beyonce going to release a remix with lyrics like, “If you’re bald then you better put a wig on it?” What a cruel message to send, especially with such a damn catchy beat. We want to flip our hair too, Willow! But we can’t.
GQ Magazine has announced its 2010 Bald 100, their ranking of the one hundred most powerful, influential and just plain bad-ass looking bald men in the USA. GQ says, “These are the men who put the balls in bald, and we salute you.”
There are a few interesting choices – namely Phil Spector, the convicted murderer, and Verne Troyer, who hasn’t done much besides urinate on carpets on reality TV. The rest of the list is a cross section of athletes, TV personalities, politicians, and a number of economic advisers.
Some unexpected entries that were nice to see include author David Shields, actor Jeffrey Tambor, and Head Blade inventor Todd Greene.
And here they are, hopefully in no particular order…
Charles Barkley, Sean Connery, Jim Cramer (CNBC’s Mad Money, Michael Jordan, Vin Diesel, Ron Howard, Samuel Jackson, political strategist, James Carville, Chef Tom Collicchio, actor Larry David, Seth Godin, Dr. Phil McGraw, George Foreman, Mort Zuckerman, Rupert Murdoch, Patrick Stewart, Michael Stipe, Magic Johnson, Kevin Garnett, Terry Bradshaw, Hulk Hogan, Jesse Ventura, John Makovich, Tony Kornheiser and Mike Wilbon, Astronaut Story Musgrave, Mike Tyson, Phil Spector, Pete Townshend, Willard Scott, David Simon (creator of The Wire), Homer Simpson, Kelly Slater, Jason Alexander, Jeff Bezos, David Gefen, Barry Diller (porn tycoon), Steve Ballmer, James Jannard, Chris Daughtry, Howie Mandel, Jeffrey Katzenberg, Craig Venter (mapped the human genome), Dick Cheney, Lloyd Blankfein, Stephen Breyer, Andre Agassi, Stanley Tucci, Matthew Weiner, The Dalai Lama, Craig Newmark (Craigslist), Ben Bernanke, Bruce Wilis, John McCain, Danny DeVito, Sam Zell, Richard Jenkins, Seal, James Taylor, Ving Rhames, Todd Greene (Head Blade inventor, David Cross, Jason Statham, Zach Lund, Paul Shaffer, Michael Clarke Duncan, Verne Troyer, Billy Corgan, Garth Brooks, Michael Milken, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Jeff Zucker, Billy Zane, Ben Kingsley, Wallace Shawn, writer David Shields, Shaquille O’Neal, Hank Paulson, Paul Volcker, Tony Dungy, Kevin Youkillis, Romany Malco, Ari Fleisher, Michael Chiklis, Jeff Van Gundy, Matt Hasselbeck, Michael Pollan, Moby, Brad Childress, Mark Messier, DMX, Cal Ripken, Stephen Covey, G. Gordon Liddy, Vernon Jordan, Damon Wayans, Ed Harris, Jeffrey Tambor, J.K. Simmons, Robert Duvall, and Evan Handler.
Frank Sinatra’s toupee, which served him well for years, has found a new home. It was sold at auction, purchased by a member of TMZ’s newsroom (article). And it may be more than a memento, the gossip monger could be using it to cover his own baldness.
To see the description of Sinatra’s toupee, check out the auction site here.